I was watching Grey's Anatomy earlier (which has now become my most recent TV show must-watch drama) and there was this patient who had seizures. They had put a brain map on her and George and Izzie were trying these different ways to get her to have a seizure because she simply wouldn't have one. They made her watching TV 2 inches from her eyes, and loaded her with espresso but neither worked. But when Izzie and George starting fighting she had a seizure. She had watched people fighting all of her life because she was a divorce attorney. Her life was watching people fight and having seizures. She wasn't having seizures in the hospital because she was happy for once. In the end, instead of having brain surgery to fix the seizures she decides to quit her job and live HAPPILY. Thats the treatment. Holy moly.
So I was watching this and it made me really miss my high school buddies and, dare I say it, school. God, I used to laugh to much with them. Now that I'm in college it seems to close to the time when I will have to find a reliable job, man and have kiddies.
I found all of these old photos from 1993, when I was one and my sister was four. They are so childish and fun. I'm either smiling in all of them or climbing on my sister like a jungle jim. I miss not working and not giving a shit about things. Children have it so lucky. I am incredibly jealous. Maybe thats why I miss working with kids, because it was my job to be funny and goofy with them. They loved nothing better than when I would chase them around on the play ground or "make dinner" in the sand box. It makes me think about my life. (sorry for writing such a serious blog. I'm really just writing pretty much anything that comes to mind).
I am studying to be a Communications and Graphic Design major. What the fuck am I going to end up doing though? I swear if I am designing the packaging for condoms I will go crazy.
The good thing though, is that I am way to committed to falling in love and going on adventures to have myself sit behind a computer messing about with Photoshop.
I really like to think that life is all about finding love. I know that may sound cliche but half of the things I think about are about being happy with someone. Maybe I just watch way to many chick flicks and think way to much about the perfect moments I have with Matt, not to say that we constantly have perfect moments because we don't but when my veins are roaring with anger over something or when I am on the verge of crying out a gallon of water it's the perfect moments that make me happy again. The LOVE that is there.
When Matt doesn't call me when he says he will I get sad, but other times he will call me at 3 AM to say his bed is too big without me and he misses me. Thats the annoying thing about love is you can't help it.
I haven't found my soulmate yet but I can't express to you how happy I will be when I finally do.
Song of the day: You don't have to cry by Crosby Stills and Nash
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